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Thesmell of late summer was in the air, with just a hintof fall breezes – my favorite time of year. I wasgetting on in years and just started retirement a fewshort months earlier. My wife continued to work to secure her retirement,having entered the work force only after my two girlshad gained their independence. Able to retire earlythanks to “downsizing,” I was finally beginning toenjoy what I had missed over the past thirty-five yearsof unforgiving commitment. There was one naggingproblem, however, that had led me to this unobtrusivestructure and triggered the “butterflies” that had beenfluttering in my gut for the past several days.My wife, Doris, is, and always has been the love of mylife. During the course of our lifetime of experiencestogether, we had enjoyed many of the simple pleasuresthat put my soul to rest. Yet, during the precedingfive years, much to the chagrin of my beloved, mysexual appetite had waned and sputtered into nonexistence. We. Hard. So much of what I’m reading is stomach-turning. Did Jennifer and Stephanie...”“Keep reading, Jess. You need to see how things developed.”“I’m not sure I can. I’m seeing some scary implications. Very scary.”“I’m not trying to be a jerk, but read or don’t read. I can’t change the past. I’m not hiding anything from you about it.”Well, the mob connections, but that was as much for her own good as mine. Only Elyse really had knowledge that something was going on, though it was possible Jennifer and Bethany had some inkling because of things that had happened in Milford. But those were so long in the past, and neither of them had said anything about the FBI investigation, so I felt pretty safe in that regard. Stephanie and Ed did know, but only tangentially. And of course, I’d done nothing in quite some time.“I feel dirty reading some of it. You and Melanie seemed to have a pretty stormy relationship.”I chuckled, “That’s one way to put it. I’m surprised you didn’t mention her suicide.
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